Prescription for Success

by Lupe Fernandez

Psssst... Hey you. Yeah you. Come here. Want a little something to help you write? Sure you do. It won't hurt a bit.

Fill out the form and take it to your nearest Writerologist.*

CHARACTERAXIN - Strengthens Character Development, Separates Protagonists from Antagonists

Possible side-effects include Confusion, Too Much Dialogue, Offending Relatives, Narcissism, One-Dimensionality and Burping.

PLOTTINE - Eases Events in Coherent Format

Possible side-effects include Confusion, Repetitive, Car Crashes, Exposition, Five Sub-Plots, Watching TV, Plagiarism and Rashes.

STORYOPLAN - Increases Inspiration and Originality

Possible side-effects include Confusion, Blank Page Syndrome, Taking Too Many Classes, Depression, Eating Chocolate Chip Cookies and Hiccups.

*Pen & Ink Management assumes no liability for rejection letters, procrastination or investigation by the FDA.