Thursday, October 14, 2010

Trick or Retreat

16 comments
by
Lupe Fernandez

Last month, I attended the SCBWI Writers Retreat in Palos Verdes. Inspired by the dedication of the staff and attendees, the Planning Dept. of Pen & Ink submit for your consideration a modest proposal. Sure, you got your Esalen, Big Sur, Rocky Flats, Edwards Air Force Base and any number of Superfund sites, but you've never seen a retreat such as:

The Official Pen & Ink Writers Retreat Complex

1) Critique Rooms - Padded walls, ergonomic chairs, and big clock with timer; separate offices for Resident editors, agents and therapists

2) Communal Dorms - Married personnel only

3) Critique Rooms - Padded walls, ergonomic chairs, and big clock with timer; separate offices for Resident editors, agents and therapists

4) Communal Dorms - Single personnel

5) Ocean Beach - White Sand; Activity Director on station to cater to all aquatic needs

6) Mental Health Center – Physical Therapy, 24 Hour Doctor, Primal Scream Enclosure, Yoga Discipline, Private Massage Bays, and 24 Hour pharmacy

7) Bike and Jogging Path - Clockwise on even days, Counterclockwise on odd days

8) Information Center – Laptops with Internet access, high volume color and b/w printers; only this location allows outside electronic contact

9) Amphitheatre -Live performances, readings

10) Fruit Trees – Fresh snacks ripe for picking

11) Tower Scrambler – Jams all radio transmission for all cell phones, laptops, Crackberries, telegraphs and passenger pigeons

12) Helicopter Pad - Transportation for personnel who don't like the submarine

13) Submarine Grotto - Access to complex via submersible

14) Forest and Hiking Trails – Get away from everyone and mediate or fight bears

Registration begins as soon as the Planning Dept. inherits several million dollars to bribe public functionaries for construction permits, right-of-way access, misplacement of property titles, and the suspension of certain UNESCO World Heritage Designations.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Mad Hatter Day

4 comments
by Susan Berger

October 6th is listed in the Holiday Insight Calendar as Mad Hatter Day.
Why? In Alice in Wonderland, the original – the mad Hatter wore a hat that had a white slip that said 10/6. This referred to the price of the hat (Ten Shillings and sixpence) but someone thought it would make a good holiday.

I like it.

In honor of Mad Hatter Day here is some writing advice from Lewis Carol’s Characters. 

March Hare
Why don't you start at the beginning?

King of Hearts
Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end: then stop.

The Gryphon
Adventures first...explanations take such a dreadful time.

Eaglet
Speak English! I don't know the meaning of half those long words, and I don't believe you do either!

Alice
What is the use of a book, without pictures or conversations?

Doorknob
Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.

The Duchess
Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.

The White Queen
Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.

And then comes the critique….

The Red Queen
Sentence first -- verdict afterwards

Alice
I don't believe there's an atom of meaning in it.

Alice
I think I should understand that better, if I had it written down: but I can't quite follow it as you say it.

The Mock Turtle
What is the use of repeating all that stuff, if you don't explain it as you go on? It's by far the most confusing thing I ever heard!

Alice
It would be so nice if something made sense for a change.

How you feel after the critique?

Alice
I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!
___________________

On October 17th Kris Kahrs and I will be attending and SCBWI event called “Down the Rabbit Hole.” We will board a train at Union Station and journey to San Juan Capistrano.

Dawne Knobbe and Svett Moondog of Infuse the Muse http://infusethemuse.wordpress.com
will stir our creative juices and we will come home replete with great ideas.

Here is a Mad Hatter exercise:. Take a saying. i.e. “skeletons in the closet” “Glass houses” and write about is as if it was real. Here is a link to a list of proverbs http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/proverbs.html

Happy writing!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

iPhone for Writers

9 comments
by
Lupe Fernandez

Sure you've seen iPhone apps here and iPhone apps there, but you've never seen iPhone apps like these. Revolutionary. Groundbreaking. Surreal. It's everything a writer will ever need in an electronic device whose  specific absorption rate is enough to roast a frozen 50lb turkey.

Presenting:
The iWriter


 Take No Prisoners!
Monitors keyboard use and transmits motivational message after 5 Second Pause. For Writers needing a prompt to keep writing. Default message: “STOP GOOFING AROUND! KEEP WRITING!”

Leave Me Alone!
Jams all electronic message devices. Prevents needless interruptions.



Be Seeing You
Hacks into WiFi devices. Spys on colleagues to see if they are writing.



iBook
Previews manuscript pages as perfection.Random generator produces back jacket promotional blubs.



The SuperNova
Self-Destruct for this device; Ten second timer.



Cruise Control
Uses complex algorithms to write manuscript without writer input.


CocoaMania
Orders gourmet chocolate for home delivery by attractive person.



Om
Transmits radio waves at 1000MHz to frontal lobe to induce relaxation. Prevents writer from destroying manuscript.


Gimme The Money!
Calculates amount of money spend on writing manuscript. Displays countdown of dwindling bank account.




BUY NOW! NOW! NOW! 
Batteries and SAR shield not included.
Not recommended for use near pregnant women, turtleneck sweaters, pace makers, Tequila bottles, stock market, post cards, granny apples, apple pie, apple cheeks and the hat check girl at Hip & Trendy's.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Interview with Publisher Lynda Burch - Guardian Angel Publishing

16 comments
by Susan Berger
With the development of the iPad, I believe eBooks are going to be more popular than ever. I’d like to introduce you to Lynda Burch who is the owner of Guardian Angel Publishing - a small press which is now listed with SCBWI. Guardian Angel is an eBook publisher which also does POD.


Why did you start Guardian Angel?

Lynda: I saw a need for children's eBooks. When I started writing musical eBooks to be played on the computer, I got wonderful feedback from big publishers and agents but they didn't know what to do with them. So I started Guardian Angel as an eBook publisher and opened to submissions, but within about a year we expanded our lines of books and we started going to print with our books, too.

What are the biggest hurdles you have had to overcome?

Lynda: Our first printer although quite large had huge fulfillment issues taking up to 3 months to fill an order and the quality of the books continually grew worse. So I jumped ship and went with Lightning Source who is a remarkable innovator in the publishing industry and gave our books broader visibility around the globe.

Another big hurdle was people thinking publishers using POD (Print On Demand) printer as a business model meant they were providing services as a self-publisher- which couldn't be farther from the truth.

But that is a whole topic by itself. We are now finally recognized as a small press publisher by SCBW&I and others, as we have been all along. We haven't changed- just their conception of us has changed. And guess what? Much, much larger companies than GAP are beginning to see the benefits of Print on Demand technology.

How do you choose which illustrator to put with an author?

Lynda: Sometimes I envision the art when I first read the story and think which style would suit it and will steer a book to an artist. But usually, I allow the author to choose a style then 2 or 3 artists. And depending on work load I send the story to one of the artists to find out if the artist "sees" the story. If they do and the artist accepts then a match is made and artist agreements are sent out.

What steps do you take once an eBook is published?

Lynda: Actually all books are created in multiple e-formats, 7 or more, and they are loaded to the various sales sites. We add new formats all the time as new eBook formats are demanded- for instance, for Kindle (chapbooks), & iPod and iPad markets. When new formats are required we stop and ready them for loading to sites.

What steps do you take once a POD is published?


Lynda: After processing them through three programs, the 2 print book files (interior and cover) with the metadata are sent to our printer, the proof comes back to me to approve and then the book is released to the various distribution networks. Once the book is off to the printer the sales & info pages are built for the website.

What is the authors’ responsibility in sales and promotion for eBooks?

Lynda: Authors don't generally get too involved in selling eBooks except the eBooks on CD. And in reality when you promote a book it doesn't matter whether it’s in print or an eBook download or on CD or DVD, it is an inter-related promotion.

Which are your best markets? TOSS? Fictionwise? Amazon? etc.

Lynda: TOSS and the Homeschool market has been a good place to sell our books. They are savvy and good eBook buyers too. Our children's fiction and nonfiction books are almost always on the bestseller's list on Fictionwise. EBook markets are growing rapidly. Amazon just announced (July 2010) that they sold more eBooks than print books this year- a sign of the times. I said that was coming for over 5 years.

Our print book distribution network sells at too many places to list and grows larger each year: Amazon, B&N, Border, Books a Million, in Canada, Europe and even show up for sale in
 India. (Most English speaking countries- that's the beauty of the internet- it’s so global.) We've sold books to little islands off the coast of Africa or in the Caribbean, Australia and more. Kind of neat to see where our books find a home.

Where do you get the energy to put in these twelve hour days?

Lynda: Well, believe it or not I am not a very high energy person. And I am definitely not a morning person. I am a slow starter with my day and gather speed as the day and evening progress and usually shut down the computers at 12:30 or so every night and then read for a couple of hours. But I am very good at organizational capabilities in my head. My brain never stops and luckily my fingers and hands follow. When I swim laps I am usually planning my day's activities if I haven't already done so in my sleep.

Where is GAP headed? (I am thinking of the iPad but I bet there are more things out there?)

Lynda: Yes, the iPad is the next step, although ALL of our eBook PDF's can already be read on the iPad right now! The EPUB program just makes them a little snappier with page turns which kids love.

The innovative BeThereBedtimeStories.com is another avenue for our eBooks to sell in. They are soft launching in July 2010- a great way for families to stay connected from a distance by reading and recording themselves reading books by video online to read to kids.

So I guess I'm not sure where we are going except up. Keeping up is the name of the game in this ever-changing marketplace for books. I'm on my toes to grab onto the next wave of new technology for Guardian Angel to embrace.

If you had it to do over again, would you have started GAP.

Lynda: Yes. Yes. Yes. I love what I do. I love the accomplishment of the finished product. My authors and artists and books from around the world have made me proud. They are winning awards and getting noticed.

But best of all our books are making a difference one child at a time. What could be better than that?

Thank you Lynda for your time.

Guardian Angel Submission Guidelines
Please note: Submissions will be closed between October 1st 2010 and April 1st 2011

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Social Media Week Los Angeles September 20-24 2010

1 comments
by Kris Kahrs

I’d like to make an introduction. SCBWI, Bloggers, Writers meet Social Media Week Los Angeles. Social Media Week is a part of your online platform. Yes it is. Of course, this means leaving the house. I know, I know – a scary proposition, but take a friend and it can be done.

What can Social Media Week do for you? As of today, there are over 75 confirmed events that you can attend at various locales next week. See the event schedule. Some of these events are free, some have a small fee. For the recluses out there, some of these events are streaming, so you can participate without leaving the discomfort of your swivel chair. 

Some of the Social Media Week events are seminars where you can play improvisation games based on biomimicry at the Viterbi School at USC while teleconferencing with a board meeting and Alan Alda, at the new Center for Science Communication. Pretty cool stuff.

For the schmoozers among us, those 24/7 party animals that just want to network ‘til their texting thumbs fall off, there are a myriad of parties: the opening beach party on Sunday, September 19th at 11 am; the Whole Foods twEat up on Monday, September 20th at 3 pm or the L.A. Foodie Beach Bash at 7 pm on Tuesday, September 21st.

Why should you slog your ever-expanding, exercise-challenged physique out to one of these darling events you ask? So many reasons. There is an event for every palate at SMW. 
  • Yoga-fan? Hit up Yoga for Real Life for the complimentary class at 7 pm on Sunday, September 19th at the Exhale Center for Sacred Movement.
  • Are you a Realtor in your other incarnation? Check out, Google vs. Facebook: Best Practices for the Realtor at 3:30 pm on Monday, September 20th. 
  • Looking for venture capital to expand your blog into an inter-galactic empire? Make sure to drop in on the Clean Tech LA and Venture Capital event at 2 pm on Tuesday, September 21st.
The locations range from Santa Monica to Pasadena, so there’s a location for all. The companies and organizations that will be in force range from IML Blue Lab to the City of L.A. to Live Nation.

If you absolutely love this type of thing and want to volunteer, or just want to try and score admission to certain events, then by all means contact Toby Daniels (SMW is his lovechild). Go to the bottom of the page and click on Get Involved. From there, just fill in the template.Go forth and enjoy.